Why Indeed!

Why?

Because my life was empty.
But you could have filled it with a thousand other things.
None of them would have fit.
But she doesn’t fit.
Exactly.
What!?
I don’t know. Have you read the blog?
Some of it.
Sorry about that.

Yeah, yeah. So, why?
Because she was the best I’d seen.
Have you seen Kate Winslet?
I’m over her.
Yeah, me too.
Although, if she called, I wouldn’t let the machine get it.
Me neither. So, why?

Shall I paint a picture?
Please do.
A man finds a rock in his shoe. He wasn’t looking for it, it wasn’t bothering him. He just took his shoe off and a rock fell out. He put the rock back in his shoe and started dancing.
Is this a haiku?
It’s too long for a haiku.
Well, yeah, but coming from you….
Shut-up. Anyway, the rock is still there.
So take it out.
I don’t want to.
Yeah, but why?
I like rocking.
That doesn’t make sense.
Exactly.

You need to take yourself more seriously.
Shall I buy a tie?
It might help. So, why?

Isn’t this getting tiring to you?
Yes, but I’m your friend.
Well, I guess the why is because I’ve always loved her.
Uh-huh.
I’m taking myself seriously right now.
Okay, okay sorry. I’ll get serious too. If you have always loved her, then why did you have all those other girlfriends?
Because I needed a lot of women to equal her. They never did.
You’re a scoundrel.
Nevertheless.
So all these other women: they didn’t look like her.
My first love looked like her. She didn’t want me either.
If I was a psychologist…
We wouldn’t be friends.
True enough.
So I liked brown haired women after that.
So why did you love the first girl?
Now we’re getting somewhere. Because I didn’t like school. I thought it was boring.
But, see, women are not there to make life more exciting. They are the help-meets.
What is a help-meet?
I think they do a lot of dishes.
Sexist!
Nevertheless.
Well, she would do a lot of dishes if she lived with me.
But that’s because you would be busy doing dumb stuff.
Like what?
Writing long dialogues.