Too Many Chicken Nuggets!

Ugh. I just ate two McDonald's cheeseburgers, a large fry and five chicken McNuggets. What the hell is a McNugget? Oh shoot, it's a fasting day! Oh well, what else is new? The commercials that McDonalds put on when I was a kid were much better than the ones they do nowadays. "I'm lovin' it!" - that's so bland. The last one wasn't much better-"We love to see you smile!" You liars, you don't care one bit whether I'm smiling or reeling from a grease overdose.

I don't remember what the slogan was when I was a kid, but I do remember little dancing talking McNuggets. They were perfect in their freakish way: McNuggets are so different looking from anything that is normally considered edible that you expect them to start singing to you. At least back then McDonalds was having a little fun with their image. Nowadays, on the cups and bags they invite you to their website to learn about their ever changing menagerie of "global casting stars". They also have a little profile of a "global casting star" on each bag. The profiles are the most condescending little pieces of drivel: one person is some extreme sports nut, another person is a deaf sign language teacher, another one is a housecleaning fool and on and on. I think the idea is to emphasize "diversity" or something, but all it ends up doing is making everyone look equally disposable: like their personality can be jotted down in a few lines on a greasy bag. But what do you expect from a place like McDonalds: A place that devotes itself to churning out an endless string of uniform food products?

So, why do I go there? Because I'm addicted to it! Help!